Lol he just called to talk about his 'gory' nightmares. He totally needs a dictionary and lots of self-help books. I don't know what he expected - okay I know he expected answers - but I refused to give him any, and just bombarded him with questions. After a while he got frustrated and I was laughing inside. Not because I was making fun of him or anything - I was making it difficult yes but not being mean... I think - but because he's such a self-centred kid. Can't believe I didn't see it all along.
I told him that my respect for him has nosedived this past week though haha, not that it matters to him because he still "values my opinions a lot". Then he tells me something that he has "rediscovered about us" - he always feels small talking to me. Yeah? And do you know how frustrating that was? When I'm trying to talk about goals and plans and us, and all you could see were barbs everywhere?? You couldn't see past yourself. I tried so hard to deliver it well because I knew how fragile you were, but nope, everything was a threat. How tiring to always be the one carrying the mantle. Add on top of that a layer of guilt that you somehow fashioned despite my greatest efforts. How tiring it must have been for you too.
Haha, I give up. The funny thing was that you were so desperate about your situation you had actually forgotten about this, until we talked again.
We're not friends; we just broke up; what did you expect? Me to coo and soothe your fears? I can be a sounding board, but if all you do is come to me for answers about yourself and your life, then I suggest you pray instead.
Good luck.
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P.S. I'd be interested to see whether this would last beyond 1-3 years. Kinda tempting to see if one of my realizations about you and falling in love is accurate or not. But then again, what may be true now may change entirely tomorrow. A lot of things - more than what we give credit for - is simply about how we see it and deal with it. I've changed a lot in the past week. Maybe you will too in the course of your new journey; I kinda wish you won't so that I get proven right, but the better part of me hopes you will. Heh.
I told him that my respect for him has nosedived this past week though haha, not that it matters to him because he still "values my opinions a lot". Then he tells me something that he has "rediscovered about us" - he always feels small talking to me. Yeah? And do you know how frustrating that was? When I'm trying to talk about goals and plans and us, and all you could see were barbs everywhere?? You couldn't see past yourself. I tried so hard to deliver it well because I knew how fragile you were, but nope, everything was a threat. How tiring to always be the one carrying the mantle. Add on top of that a layer of guilt that you somehow fashioned despite my greatest efforts. How tiring it must have been for you too.
Haha, I give up. The funny thing was that you were so desperate about your situation you had actually forgotten about this, until we talked again.
We're not friends; we just broke up; what did you expect? Me to coo and soothe your fears? I can be a sounding board, but if all you do is come to me for answers about yourself and your life, then I suggest you pray instead.
Good luck.
----
P.S. I'd be interested to see whether this would last beyond 1-3 years. Kinda tempting to see if one of my realizations about you and falling in love is accurate or not. But then again, what may be true now may change entirely tomorrow. A lot of things - more than what we give credit for - is simply about how we see it and deal with it. I've changed a lot in the past week. Maybe you will too in the course of your new journey; I kinda wish you won't so that I get proven right, but the better part of me hopes you will. Heh.
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